I’m going back in time to a Saturday a few weeks ago when I was commandeered into going to Mr Kwak’s (my boss) son’s first birthday party.

First birthday celebrations are big in Korea so all the teachers were invited. In the past, due to numerous childhood diseases and the sharp changes in seasons, many Korean children died before their first birthday. Survival rates increased dramatically once the child reached the age of one making the first birthday an important milestone for both the child and its parents.

It is traditional to pool money and give the child a gold ring on their first birthday. Something we didn’t find out about until we arrived at the party, luckily the Korean teachers had already sorted it out. The ring isn’t for the child to wear but for the parents to use towards the cost of education later in the child’s life.

The party was held at a hotel over an hour from Kumdan, Katrina and I were given a lift by one of the Korean teachers and her husband. Arriving at the hotel Kwak, dressed in a cream suite jacket and light grey trousers, was greeting people at the entrance with a wide smile. As we walked in he smiled and thanked us for coming. It was strange to see him wearing light colours and smiling. It was like being greeted by his nicer twin brother!

Inside the room was decorated in white and silver with blue and white balloons on each table. At one end of the room there was an alter or Tol table covered with fruit, ddeok (rice cakes) and surrounded by balloons with a massive arc of silver balloons rising above it. Around the room were numerous large photos of the birthday boy, whose name escapes me!

We picked a table near the door, easier to escape, and sat down. There was a generous spread of food and the first thing we were encouraged to do was eat. The food included the usual Korean rice, rice and more rice accompanied by fish and more fish. Bust nestling amongst it there was plenty of tastier food to be had. Much of it was more like you’d expect of Chinese food and Katrina and I happily tucked in.

Whilst we were eating Irene (one of the kindy kids) arrived with her parents and sat at a table near us. She immediately spotted me and shyly, for once, looked over grinning. She sat there making faces at me desperate to come over and say hello, but she wasn’t so sure of herself outside of school. Eventually she plucked up the courage and came over saying: “Jenna teeeeachherrrrrr.” We had a brief “how are you? I’m fine” conversation before we’d run out of ways of verbally communicating and she ran back to the comfort of her parents.

Whilst we were finishing our food they showed a video of the child’s first year of life. The was mainly an amalgamation of photos, many of which featured Kwak. It was strange to see his life outside school. It made me realise that he was a real person with a family. Being lorded over by him all the time at school you forget there is any more to him; and aside from his daughter, Amy, being in kindy there has never been any mention of his personal life. The first time I knew he had a son was when I was invited to the party!

After the video and the cake cutting it was time for the Toljabee event. For this the child was dressed in traditional birthday clothes called a Tol-bok and sat on a chair at the Tol table. Four items were placed in front of him, a ball of string, a rice cake, money and a pencil. The party goers waited with baited breath to see which of the items he would pick up first. If he chose the ball of string he would have a long life, the rice cake the child is not smart, the money he would be rich and the pencil he would be a successful academic.

It looks as though he is set to be academic as he chose the pencil then whilst posing for photos proceeded to smack his father in the face with it!

It was a strange party, guests had been coming and going all afternoon, there didn’t seem to be any real beginning or end to the celebration just a steady stream of guests arriving and leaving. I guess that’s the Korean way, but I was surprised at how few people appeared to be there. Once the Toljabee was over the party really had finished and we headed back to Kumdan.

More photos of the party can be found here.

* Posted by j150vsc on 17/05/2007.